Taking a Break

Most diet methods do not advocate taking a whole day to eat whatever, but today I decided I needed a break. It was a rough few days with the kids, and I have done great for 3 weeks and am down 8 lbs, so I decided to have a nice dinner and a few drinks when the kids went to bed. Dammit I deserve it!!
I stayed on track through lunch, and then decided I wanted food. I made a cocktail and had some pizza. HOORAY. Now I no longer feel like I am going to binge on everything.

Back to the grind, and the gym, tomorrow, as hubby will be home.

March Madness

I am issuing myself a personal challenge. I am calling it March Madness-Pin-up Pump. I am challenging myself to lose as much as I can in 31 days. This is a challenge to MYSELF and only MYSELF. If I lose, I fail MYSELF. I am not setting an amount, I am just going to focus on doing what I can, as much as I can, as best I can.

No weighing, no measuring, no reporting. March 1 I am THROWING AWAY my scale. I repeat the best quote from Runs for Cookies- Don't do anything you aren't prepared to do for the rest of your life. I HATE counting. I HATE weighing. I HATE measuring. If I can change the WAY I eat, and the WAY I exercise, and the WAY I think about food, then I cannot fail.

Nice long weekend

Bad decision. Bad Decision. BAD DECISION!!!!
LOL
This weekend, we had Amelia's birthday party. I proceeded to make myself sick on food. By 10 am I had eaten my weight in sandwiches, I had 3 cupcakes, and 2 pieces of pizza. I had a ton of food while watching the game yesterday- and I have already had a big breakfast today, though in my defense, in my eggs are mushrooms and spinach.

GAH. On to better days. Headed back to Beaumont in a bit. The van threw a CEL yesterday so I have to get Doug to his car which is at my moms, and then get the spark plugs replaced in the van tomorrow. Good times.

Birthday Parties

I went to my moms yesterday to get ready for Amelia's 4th birthday party today. This means I spent the day baking cupcakes, which means I was not hungry at all by the end of the day. If I cook a lot, I find that all food grosses me out and I never want to eat.

This morning I have finished icing the cupcakes- blue icing on chocolate and vanilla cakes with Toy Story Squeaky sprinkles. :) I had a lick of icing, but I didn't want any more. That said, I was starving from not eating dinner last night, and I DID devour a pastrami and turkey sandwich loaded with pepperjack cheese. In my defense, I don't anticipate getting much of a chance to eat today, so it is okay I think.
I am so tired and it is going to be such a long, but fun day.

Friday Weigh-In

Well, yesterday finished out okay. For dinner we had a pasta that was essentially the exact same as my pizza, except on noodles instead- garden rotini actually.
I did have a nice dessert- a milkshake- but it was 3 small scoops of ice cream and 2% milk, and only filled a smaller solo cup.

So Friday is my weigh in day. And today was... drumroll please......


204.4

It's a start.

I am a little upset. I was so proud of getting out and running yesterday, and then hubby laughed at how long it took me to run a mile. I am sorry if I cannot run a 7 minute mile like he can... I NEVER could run a mile that fast, and I never will be able to run a mile that fast. (I'd settle for anything under 10) But aside from once or two short bursts on the treadmill, I have not run in a LONG time. It took a lot for me to get off my ass and do it, but I did!! And he laughed.
:(

Lunch Pizza

This pizza is only around 450 calories. I have never thought shrimp on a pizza sounded good before but this was AMAZING. I topped an 8 inch Boboli crust with a little pizza quick, and sauteed some shrimp, mushrooms, artichokes and spinach in a tiny bit of olive oil. Topped it on the crust with a little part skim mozzarella and there you have it!! It was SOOOOOOOO good!!!

Pioneer Trail Style

I didn't just fall off the wagon this time. The wheels broke while crossing the river, the horses drowned, and I barely managed to paddle to the other side.

I gorged myself through the holidays. That was fun. Not so much now, but while it lasted. I started going to the diner again while hubby is home. Bad decision. Mmmm french toast.

I started back on soda. I was doing so good without it, but I needed the caffeine one day, and just fell for it. Bad decision.

I started snacking on things more. Bad decision.

I quit going to the gym again, mostly because hubby is never here for me to go, but even when he is, I go maybe 2 times a month. Bad decision.

As you can see, I am not really making excuses. I am owning up to the fact that every one of these is a bad decision.

Last week, I was at my moms for a few days. Thursday, after I got there, we had a delightful meal of tamales and baked potatoes covered in taco meat and tons of cheese (bad decision). That night, I had one of my stomach upsets that left me wondering if I had consumed artificial sweetener, which is what usually causes it.
Friday, I went to lunch with a friend. We had Cheddars, and I had a great New Orleans pasta covered in a spicy alfredo sauce (bad decision). That night, it started again, and it was CLEARLY my gallbladder. I was in so much pain, I nearly went to the hospital. Just as that decision was being made, it finally quit, and I was able to sleep.

After the two days I spent in pain, I decided it might be a good idea to chop a few trees and rebuild that wagon. I cannot live in pain, and I am in no place to have surgery to remove my gallbladder. So step one is cutting out fatty extras. No fried meats, less butter, less processed fat filled foods. Maybe I will realize that losing it is more than just vanity. (good decision)

I am after hubby to buy me a NordicTrack incline trainer. Most people, it would go by the wayside, but I am a treadmill junkie, and I think that I need it, since he is never around long enough for me to go to the gym. Here is to hoping he will agree. (good decision)

Also, I really have to write in this more, even if it is just to say, "Hey, today SUCKED!!" (good decision)

Three days

I made it 3 days on my modified juice diet before I totally binged. I got home from moms, I got bored, I got lonely, and I ate. A LOT. But I still have not had any soda, and I am drinking unsweet tea and water only, in addition to the juice.

I have decided not to beat myself up over this binge, and I am not giving up either. Back to the grind tomorrow. A fresh start first thing in the am. I can handle that.